Ah yes, if by “highbrow” you mean I have and entire
vase of brow pencils, a plastic tray full of eyebrow gel, pencil and powder and
browse ULTA’s stencil section like an art exhibit, then yes. Oh, that was a
clever pun.
In my first post, I wrote from the perspective of a
highly-sensitive person, and this post will seem contradictory, perhaps, but it’s
really not. Being introspective, analytical and honestly downright obsessive
can be very useful traits. They are the reason I have ever excelled at anything
from spreadsheets to friendship, because attention to (obsession with) detail
and a feeling, constantly reflective, self-questioning mind keeps me honest and
in touch with my own intentions, thus it typically creates a decent dynamic
with other people and a stellar work-ethic. That said, I have always had this
other side that constantly competes with it: not highly-sensitive, but highly superficial. This side just barely
transcends into my relationships and work sphere, but my personal time is
absolutely infiltrated with the most shallow of interests. Need some examples?
Okay: Gossip Girl. Nail polish. Celebrity news. Selfies. A Ke$ha station on my
Pandora list. Lady Gaga posters. Stacks of Vogue. Trays of lipstick. This is side
is represented by the “lipstick” after the “lit” in my bog title, get it??!!
I am not writing this, believe it or not, to
describe myself and write a vain autobio about how well-rounded I think I am!
Tricked ya. I’m writing this to encourage you, thinky people, to embrace your
guilty pleasures and recognize them as mental vacations. Now you may be a
little less shallow than me. Your mental vacays may simply employ a sun-chair
and a great book, an album with actual musical merit and acclaim among real
artists. You may actually unwind while cooking—my mom does, and everyone around
her benefits. It doesn’t really matter. My college-self hid most of my
superficial interests in attempt to look cool (LOL ME, COOL!!!), but I have
actively decided that looking cool as an adult just takes too much damned
energy and I’m really just not. So here comes:
How
to vacation and use your free-time to really recharge!
1. Stop trying to be cool.
Your energy is valuable, sacred, even. You have to do crappy adult things now
like actually cook healthy food and do laundry more often than once a month. I
can’t get away with grabbing some Cookout at 2am and say “I ate today,” nor can
I pull off that awesome grungy I-haven’t-washed-my-hair-in-five-days-because-I’m-so-consumed-with-art
look. You might even work out for a few weeks or do a juice cleanse (I still
don’t know what that actually means). We cannot waste energy on looking cool,
teachers and young professionals!!! Now if you are just naturally cool, don’t
feel bad. I know lots of people who are sneaker-heads, poets and stellar
musicians outside of work. That’s just natural coolness and I can’t compete. I do
love poetry, art and good music—A LOT, but honestly, when I’m tired and off
work, I’m way more comfortable diving into a soap opera than Ezra Pound. It’s
easier for me to blog or journal than compose. Easier to polish my nails than
paint a beautiful shabby-chic table.
2. Let yourself have fun.
This has become the hardest “work” of my life. When I am blessed with a day
off, I have a to-do list of admirable adult tasks hanging over me: buy
vegetables, make salads in mason jars, DIY some curtains, organize my closet, store
the off-season wardrobe, scrub a baseboard. Realistically, though, those things
are not fun or relaxing for me. Relaxing is a candle, a yoga mat and Biggie
Smalls radio. #Srynotsry. Get the boring stuff done when you have to, but I have
learned that part of my mental survival means letting go of ambitious Pinterest
projects and buying a canvas on clearance from Michael’s to throw paint all
over and hanging it above my bed. Luckily I’m learning to be reflective enough
to evaluate my intentions.
3. Ask yourself about your intentions.
Are you spending your leisure time doing what you enjoy or what you think you’re
supposed to enjoy? Are you people-pleasing or resting? If I’m constantly pleasing outside of work, I have never really left work.
People-pleasing has its place and is necessary in healthy doses, whether you’re
a customer-service rep or turning grades in to your principal. At home, wave it
off like a nasty fly, ask yourself what you were doing the last time you felt
happy and relaxed and do that thing.
4. Be selfish.
Hahahahaha, joke-blogger! That could be the title for this whole post, ya
Nicki-Minaj-loving-FREAK! (You totally thought that.) But really, between
talking to parents, lesson planning and delivering content to
fifteen-year-olds, my day is pretty packed with tasks completely unrelated to
things that make me feel good. Most of the weekdays are chore-lists. Even when I
get home, boiling pasta and folding laundry are CHORES. Admit to your loved
ones that you need the alone time you’re finally getting. View the time sitting
on the couch reading the book from college you have neglected to read for years
because you “don’t have time” as necessary, not a waiting period for someone to
call and relieve you of having to spend time admitting that focusing long
enough to read that book is actually a task—a task you’re enjoying and a task
you really need for yourself.
5. Be unselfish.
Wait…whaaaaaa? Yeah, I know I just told you to be selfish, but moderate that shit;
don’t be gross. Recognize that your time to escape from your job and the fact
that you have a job to escape from are privileges.
People helped you get them. Some people have neither. There is no way in hell I
can claim that I got my job, am keeping my job, have a degree that got said
job, have an apartment, internet and have fun gadgets to entertain myself with
because of my own hard work and intelligence and deserve it because one of the
above. My mom helped bail me out of a nasty credit disaster. My sister lets me
vent. My friend let me stay with her for an unbelievably low rent price through
teacher training. Friends drove me to interviews when I didn’t have a car. Admit that. Don’t feel guilty about it,
just be thankful. I am preaching to myself, here, mind you. I’m writing this
partially for my own reflection. Give me a month into the new semester and I
will be whining about my really difficult life and how no one appreciates me to
some unfortunate friend on the other end of the “emergency” phone call. I gotta
remind myself this stuff!!! To make time for gratitude and the people that choose
to be in my life. Give up some of that selfish time to spend an hour on the
phone with a loved one or visit that kid you used to babysit. Let the people
you unload on talk interrupted for a change (!!!!!). That was totally a note just
for me ;)
Xoxo and happy second
semester. Spring is coming!!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment