I started ballet when I was three. I am SUPPOSED to be a ballerina right now (Also a fashion designer, rock star and famous poet LOLZ). I was an ambitious child. I still love ballet and fashion and words; my infinite challenge has been to integrate all the things I love into my adult life; the task has proven exceptionally difficult and has made be bitter at times. How can one possibly hold a full-time job, be good at said job AND carve out time to dance, read, write and keep up with clothing/nail polish/ shoe trends??!! I'm still figuring that out. Realizing that I don't have to pigeon-hole myself as "A TEACHER" has been refreshing. Becoming a teacher transformed me. I was suddenly waking up at 4:30 and not only eating breakfast (ew!), but YOGURT!!! I quit smoking, quit staying out on weeknights, became overly cautious about social media posts and all photograph-taking things. I am learning to budget on a regular albeit modest salary. These things are so adult to me they're depressing. I used to sleep until eleven, stay up late writing or talking philosophy (well, it seemed like philosophy at the time), shopping vintage and basically wearing what normal people consider costumes as my every day clothing. I was fun and creative; maybe even unpredictable. The new routine and responsibility of teaching feels good sometimes, it's rewarding, but it also makes me feel old. I got in a serious rut of boring-ness and self-disgust. I wasn't active or happy. I was swamped in papers, pony-tailed and covered in dry-erase marker and bagel-crumbs. This is all to lead into:
"HOW I ACCIDENTALLY BECAME A BALLERINA AGAIN--TA-DA!!!!"
This winter break, I decided that for my sanity and mental, emotional and physical health, I HAD to start working out. The problem with working out, though, is that working out also makes me feel old. It's so routine, so suburban, so...everything I have been disliking about myself. I don't know if that makes sense to other people but I have just been bucking the traditional routes as hard as possible since college.
So, being the hyper-competitive lady I am, I chose CrossFit. Other people are doing it, they look strong, it involves squats, Beyonce's new album is all about the booty--so yeah, CrossFit. I figured if I'm gonna work out, I might as well reaaallly work out. Get strong, look hot, all that stuff. I love it. Instantly obsessed. Addicted, maybe. The endorphin high is the best, the inside of the gym is such a new and novel thing for me, since I have never played a sport or touched an actual barbel.
Just for fun, here is my trial class experience in a retroactive, faux live-Tweet list:
5:30: this gym is ginormous! These guys' necks are ginormous!
5:35: "so Kathryn, have you ever dead lifted?" "No. I have never anything-lifted. That's why I'm here. I'm tired of you know, like, noodling around." "HAHA NOODLING AROUND. THAT'S GREAT."
6:00: this warm-up was nothing. Gimme your best shot, baby fit.
6:05: "heyyyy. We have another first-timer. Have you done crossfit before?" Deep voice: "we'll, I played college football." Hashtag dammit. Hashtag I did college modern dance??!!
6:06: OMG WALL BALLS. FMLFMLFML.
6:07: I might break a nail and someone might die.
6:08: I might die.
6:15: hey, I'm only 30 seconds behind an ex football player. I rock. I can do anything.
6:16: I do not rock I am going to barf and die.
6:30: "how do you guys feel?" "Fine. Yeah. That was great."
6:35: "hey remember when I said I felt fine? I actually thought I was having an aneurism and dying. But I didn't want to say anything just in case." "Uhhhh...okay. Well glad you didn't die." "Me too."
6:40: "so Kathryn, what are your goals?" "Im thinking like...total Beyonce in 5 weeks plan or something?" "HAHA THAT'S GREAT. BEYONCE."
Okay so now to the ballet part.
The next day, I was soooo sore, and somehow, in my non-athletic, monstrously unhealthy and out-of-shape brain I know already that lying or sitting down all day is the wrong decision. So, still on the last leg of the endorphin fuel, I cranked up some Ke$ha and started moving around on my yoga mat; basic cats and cows to get all the kinks out of my back, which had now indeed touched a barbel. I dragged my step-ladder into the room and started doing sets of pliés. To finish each set, I did port de bras to the back and front, and WOW it was, like, the perfect counter-stretch to lifting and squatting and all the other new stuff! I did ballet stuff for an hour! The next day, I went back to CrossFit feeling slightly sore but overall great, and the next day, I did ballet again.
AN IMAGE:
In case you're all like, "what's a port de bras and why is it the perfect back stretch???!!!"
There you have it, Ballet + CrossFit = BFF.
xoxo.
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